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THE Coherent AEW Take: Rampage Was AWFUL!?

 WOW! Another AEW recap despite how inconsistent this written series is? This must be an odd kinda week, right? 

AEW Dynamite and Rampage were aight as a whole although I did find Rampage to be quite yawn-inducing despite being an hour-long program. 

Rampage. 

Highlights. 

None, unfortunately. 

Some Other Things That Happened. 

Satnam Singh led his partner (Jay Lethal) to victory as they defeated Dave Vega and Matt Fitchett - Still don't get the hype AEW has for the big guy. 

*Unenthusiastic* Yay, Will Ospreay's AEW in-ring debut - Cool.

Eddie Kingston defeated Jake Hager - Eddie Kingston aka wrestling's uncle. A decent match is all I'll say. 

Red Velvet lost to Kris Statlander then chaos ensued - This ain't an AEW Show without a brawl or two, right? 

Dynamite. 

Highlights. 

Jurassic Express vs The Young Bucks For the AEW World Tag Team Championship In *Dario Cueto's Voice* A LADDER MATCH! 

Ladder match? The Young Bucks? A recipe for an enjoyable encounter. The Jackson bros won the championship for the 3rd time. The first tag team in AEW to do so. 

That led to an unprettier and a conchairto from Christian to Jungle Boy. I guess both Edge and Christian had to……...switch roles (get it? Switch? Kill switch?).

Dax Hardwood vs Will Ospreay. 

Dax honestly carried Ospreay (FIGHT ME!). The match ruled harder than the captain of the Normandy spaceship. 

Ospreay won the match with an elbow to Dax's head and guess what happened? 

A brawl happened but luckily, it didn't last long as Orange Cassidy appeared and confronted the former IWGP champion. 

Some Other Things That Happened. 

Chris Jericho defeated Ortiz in a hair vs hair match - RIP Ortiz's long locks. I had to lose my afro when I found out my hair was receding faster than the speed of light. 

Also, Sammy Guevara reuniting with Jericho was the most Vince Russo level of plot twist I've ever seen all week.

Wardlow goes to war with a bunch of security guards - aka a 100 million-view clip waiting to happen. Also, really?  Wardlow siding with a guy that lost a boxing match with a vine star (bro, if I was him, you "guys" will never see me again). 

Oh, look. Another brawl/beatdown segment. This time between Jon Moxley, Hiroshi Tanahashi and Jericho Appreciation Society  - AEW loves their brawl more than Vince McMahon's treatment of women. 

Ethan Page lost to Miro in the All-Atlantic championship tournament - BULGARIA STRONG!  

Toni Storm defeated Britt Baker - the doctor is indeed down. 

Jay White said to both Hangman Page and Adam Cole, "no championship opportunity for y'all" - so, they're basically Man United then. 

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