WWE Smackdown 3/12/21 | A Coherent Review.

Another meh episode of Smackdown and this is probably the part where I slap my head and say, “HERE’S WHY!”.

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My Man Brook Shagner Told Sami Zayn, "Why Can't You Face Roman Reigns Tonight Instead Of Day One?"

The witty headline above pretty much described the entire opening although it wasn't as in-depth as a Wrestling Inc article or something.

Sami Zayn followed through Brick's advice but the former universal champion laid waste on Sami with a good old F5.

That gave the tribal chief the opportunity to nail the spear and the guillotine to quickly retain the blue belt.

Seeing all of this unfold, makes me miss the babyface Sami Zayn I know and love. From that character point of view, it's so depressing to see him in that position.

You could say the same thing about Will Smith right now with Jada.

All bad humour aside, it'll be interesting to see where Paul Heyman's loyalty lie on.

Sasha Banks vs Shayna Baszler.

A Wrestlemania worthy main event calibre match if Shayna Baszler hasn't had a rocky main roster run.

Nevertheless, it was a good match. A very good match as a matter of opinion. Banks wins with the most protective move in pro wrestling, a schoolboy roll-up.

The Viking Raiders vs Los Lotharios.

The match ended via an inside cradle from Angel to Erik after Rick Boogs tried to distract Angel.

Wait. Somebody actually overcame the distraction finish!? That has to be a cap, right?

Oh, and Viking Raiders danced along with Shinsuke and Rick Boogs even though they were the reason why they lost the match. I guess the powers of Valhalla included the power of positivity.

Jeff Hardy and Drew McIntyre ruined Happy Talk which sounds either really good or really bad out of context.

I, for one, think that scene was really dull.

More comic book strips with Xia Li continues and like all of those vignettes, it's well-produced but I just can't see her being utilized greatly for more than a month or so.

King Woods vs Jey Uso.

A good match is all I'll say about this. The bout ended with a DQ because Jimmy Uso made Woods slip onto the ring apron but fortunately for the king, his loyal knight came to aid the monarch himself.

I mean, I can't complain about a New Day and Usos match again so I do not have any pessimism about this feud.

Sheamus vs Cesaro.

Former members of The Bar battled it out in a solid exhibition.

Sheamus defeated "it's my time to shine for the millionth time" Cesaro with the brogue kick.

And the final segment of the episode is Charlotte getting a pie thrown out by Toni Storm. I hate the fact that a feud between two talented performers revolves around pie-throwing.

So, to recap all of you slow mofos.

Like: the in-ring work from the likes of Sasha Banks and Shayna Baszler, Sheamus and Cesaro, Woods and Jey Uso.

Didn’t like: The sad state of Sami Zayn’s character, Whatever the hell is a Happy Talk.

NXT Takeover: 30 | A Coherent Review.

NXT Takeovers have delivered greatly throughout the "30 years" of Takeover shows. This one, in my opinion, wasn't it. For a Takeover program, this was disappointing. All of the Takeovers are A's or B's and Takeover 30 was a C at best. At least, I like the stage production set. pictures via WWE.com PRESHOW: Breezango vs Legado De La Fantasma vs Oney Lorcan And Danny Burch. Winner Faces Imperium For The NXT Tag Team Championship. It was a fine match. Joaquin Wilde's ring gear was really cool even though it took a bit out of the seriousness from the Legado De La Fantasma stable. I'm just nitpicking though. Breezango actually won the match and will go on to face Imperium for the tag belts. MAIN SHOW: Finn Balor vs Timothy Thatcher. Timothy Thatcher started off this match with a series of punches which he then later transitioned into various submission moves. Pretty much, Finn has no choice but to adapt to...

WWE RAW 28/2/22 | A Coherent Review.

Another week, another episode of Monday Night RAW aka a 2 hour podcast for an angry bearded white guy. Kevin Owens and Seth Rollins spoke with Alpha Academy and……….. It led to a stunner from Kevin Owens to Chad Gable I can't criticize the way Gable says thank you because after all, he's a chad. The segment followed with a decent tag team match between two former rivals and the Academics. And like their dating life, the Alphas took an L here. This is the part where I would be mad at the tag champs getting pinned but those titles, as well as the entire tag division, are so meaningless, I don't have the energy to do so. T-Bar vs Omos. T-Bar lost a match and Omos can't wrestle for sh*ts. In other news, the colour of blood is red. Bianca Belair, Rhea Ripley And Liv Morgan vs Becky Lynch, Doudrop And Nikki A.S.H. Bianca once again proves that she owns all of the EST by leading her team to victory with the KOD on Nikki Ash Ketchum....

Top 3 BEST Distraction Finishes EVER!

Distraction endings to a wrestling match in WWE depend on one another if you think about it. It's like the peanut butter and jelly or the chicken and the basmati biryani rice or Dan Lambert and sexism. "Why top 3", you may ask? Because one, I'm different and two, well, I'm different, so be gone to the mofos that think it's shorter than Brock Lesnar's bout with Kofi Kingston. (WARNING: This piece is mostly sarcasm). Daniel Bryan vs Sheamus. Wrestlemania 28. I know this made your eyebrows raise as high as Rocky Maivia but think about this. The kiss from AJ Lee that led to a brogue kick from Sheamus, has in some way, led to the general audience seeing how Daniel Bryan should be WAY higher in the overall arc than where he was at that time. Also, this was also the year where Bryan showed off his comedic chops with his "NO" catchphrase and his tag team run with the big red conservative, Kane. If anything, this distraction finish was a great chara...

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