It's not like WWE has ever messed up a performer's momentum, am I right? (That sarcasm was drier than Robert Patterson's sense of humour).
All jokes aside, I thought this show was actually decent.
Here's hoping that next week or the weeks after aren't a stinker.
Images via WWE.com
Drew McIntyre vs Sheamus.
Monday Night RAW starting the show with a match is refreshing.
And I immediately spoke too soon as Drew cut a promo before this about how he's had the worst February ever, recapping what happened to him that month.
The Miz and John Morrison came out to tell Drew McIntyre that the Scotsmen is handling the WWE title with loss and wanted the former WWE champion to join him because Miz has a huge target on his back.
McIntyre wasn't having Miz's BS to which MVP told The Miz that he has an hour to defend his championship.
Sheamus showed up and both former men brawled that led to the show's opening bout.
You know WWE, you could've just started off with the match without all of this, right?
The stuff before the match was COMPLETELY unnecessary and a waste of time if I'm being honest.
The opening contest itself kicked all sort of a*****. Not a surprise that they beat the hell out of each other.
McIntyre wins with the Claymore kick.
Nia Jax vs Naomi.
Jax picked up the victory. I can rant about Naomi’s current utilization on TV but alas.
The Miz vs Bobby Lashley For The WWE Championship.
So, what happened in this bout?
After Miz's music hits, The Miz didn't show up because he had stomach problems (same after consuming anything dairy) due to anxiety.
As a guy that deals with anxiety, I appreciated that WWE explored Miz's anxiety and nervousness going into the big match.
WWE has explored a serious topic like mental health that didn't feel insulting to the audience.
So, Mizzy has to defend that championship in under an hour.
Later in the night, the match actually happened and The Miz immediately ran away, giving Bobby Lashley a count-out victory however, he hasn't captured the WWE championship.
At least, not yet.
Shane O made the stipulation that if The Miz doesn't defend the championship then he's stripped of the title.
So, Miz had to go with the flow. McMahon also brought in some lumberjack aka the only time that a lumberjack match made sense.
Lashley of course, captured the championship which makes him THE NEW world wrestling entertainment champion.
BLACK EXCELLENCCCCCCCCCCCCCE!
You know who I thank for making that moment possible? MVP.
This dude went from going to become a producer behind the scenes to actually rebuilding 3 careers back from the ground up.
I legit was soured on Bobby Lashley because of the way he was written on TV and within a span of a year, I became a mark for the guy.
And THAT deserves nothing more than praise.
Braun Strowman Thinks Adam Pearce and Shane McMahon Don't Like Him.
Yes, Braun Strowman basically pulled the Sami Zayn bit but without using the word "conspiracy".
Shane McMahon told Braun Strowman to relax which is ironic because Shane sounds like he's out of breath every time he speaks.
Shane made a tag team match between Adam Pearce and Braun Strowman for the RAW tag team championship you know, because of "conflict resolution".
And of course, there were some miscommunications between Braun Strowman and Adam Pearce that led to an L from em.
This is obviously leading to a match between Shane O and Braun Strowman.
And based on some of the matches Shane has had with big guys, it can be fun to watch.
Or, it can lead to a dud like his match with The Undertaker at Wrestlemania 32.
Elias vs Damian Priest.
In a backstage segment, Elias met with Bad Bunny before the match about a possible musical alliance and Bad Bunny refused.
Oh, and Priest won a match yet again.
Randall Keith Orton got spooked by Alexa Bliss casting a spell of some sort and bought in a Randy Orton clone.
What in the mac and cheese was that?
Charlotte Flair Wants A RAW Women's Championship Match At Wrestlemania.
The headline above was the gist of Charlotte's promo.
Nia Jax and Shayna Baszler told Flair that they're the dominant force in WWE.
This is funny because after it, Baszler faced Charlotte in a match and Baszler took the pin.
Riddle And The Lucha House Party vs Retribution.
Retribution lost again and it was from Lince Dorado pinning SlapJack.
From being portrayed as a dominant stable to losing to the Lucha House Party. That sentence honestly sounds funny.
At least Mustafa Ali picked up the victory in a singles match against Riddle though.
So, to recap for all of you slow mofos.
Like: The story of Miz's anxiety, Bobby Lashley winning the WWE championship, Drew Mcintyre vs Sheamus.
Didn't like: Nitpicking but the opening segment was unnecessary.
What do you guys think about this episode of RAW? Sound off in the comments below. Follow me on the tweets @omartheplayaguy and follow this very blog for honest pro wrestling opinions. Anyway, stay safe smarks.
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