Skip to main content

WWE RAW 24/1/22 | A Coherent Review.

Monday Night RAW had the "it's not bad" type of episode this week. That's it. That's my take on the red white ropes brand. 

Kid Brock Looking Like A Cowboy, Baby! 

Massive apologizes for that headline above that is referring to a man that appreciates his "southern heritage". 

This opening act was an actual weigh-in for both men. The WWE champion also weighs in on how Bob isn't walking out of the Royal as a 2-time champion because Bobby WHO!? 

I enjoyed the way Paul allows Brook Laser to embrace his antics by letting the big man talk. It's actually a fresh way to spice up Heyman and Lesnar's overall chemistry. 

Bianca Belair vs Queen Zelina Vega. 

Why has this match lasted for more than a minute? I have no idea since Belair could've easily defeated one half of the women's tag champion with ease. 

At least the EST won the match with the KOD so that does it, I guess? 

Kevin Owens vs Damian Priest For The United States Championship. 

Finally, some good f**king professional wrestling match! 

Despite some moments of struggle from Priest, the former North American championship managed to retain the championship…….. in a DQ finish.

WWE loves their DQs more than AJ Styles based on that damn commercial almost 2 years ago. 

Rhea Ripley, Dana Brooke And Liv Morgan vs Carmella, Tamina And Nikki A.S.H 

Corey Graves be slandering Bryon Saxton probably because he's happy with being "blacker than Bryon" (which is really the top 3 most nonsensical things I've ever heard in my 22 years of existence). 

The match was forgettable. Rhea Ripley led her team to victory which was followed by a sneak attack by Scottish Homelander? Cool, I guess. 

R K The Bee: Alpha Competition. 

If you can't tell already, this was a spelling bee. Disappointed that they didn't get to spell "iridocyclitis" just for the giggles but whatever. 

The segment was WWE's way of showcasing one of their signature tropes, their lame sense of humour because I thought this was pretty mediocre in my opinion.  

The scene led to a singles match between Randal and Chaddy which saw Pedro Pascal looking mofo hitting the RKO onto Chad Gable to win the match. 

Just when I thought I was done with the BS, we're getting a scooting race scene planned for next week. F**k yes, dude! So excited. 


The "if I can fix her" line was a segment" continues as Alexa Bliss talked about her history with Lily. Meh. 

Austin Theory vs AJ Styles. 

The match was aight. Styles hits the phenomenal forearm to prevail in this encounter. 

On one hand, losing to AJ Styles isn't a bad thing. After all, he is an OG in this business, right? 

On the other hand, once you found out that you lost to a flat earther, that is when your perception has lost into the deepest of the ocean. 

I mean, it is laughable to state that Theory had a perception in the first place but that's a different story. 


Doudrop, like me, is sick of the Beckys out there by trying to beat the hell out of the RAW women's champion that is named Becky Lynch. Now that's what you call a white ally! Keep it up. 

The Street Profits vs Rey And Dominik Mysterio. 

A decent tag team bout.  The win from the Mysterios led to everybody pretending that it's the Royal Rumble match. Cool. 


Seth Rollins is like, "imma show up this Friday on Smackdown". I mean, I too want to leave Monday Night RAW (out of my consciousness for most weeks). 

And the final segment of the evening goes to Edge and his wife, Beth Phoenix, tearing up Miz's celebration with Maryse. It's not bad but that's being said, I still don't care about any of this.

So, to recap for all of you slow mofos. 

Like: The opening segment, Kevin Owens vs Damian Priest 

Didn't like: SHUT THE F**K UP, COREY, The spelling bee segment. 


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Roman Reigns Relinquishes The Universal Title Because He Has Leukemia.

I have a sad and unfortunate news to break. Two hours ago on RAW, Roman cut a great promo pretty much stating that he's been living with leukemia for over 11 years and the disease's return forced him to give up the universal championship. The segment ended with both shield members Dean Ambrose and Seth Rollins gave a group hug to Roman and did the triple shield fist pump. Ever since that, fellow WWE superstars reacted to the news on Twitter and here are the tweets so far. An amazing human being, an incredible performer & a man I’m proud to be friends with. My thoughts & prayers are with you & your family. Get well soon, champ! #ThankYouRoman https://t.co/jL1Q5dVvzs — #WOKEN, yet #BROKEN, Matt Hardy (@MATTHARDYBRAND) October 23, 2018 My heart right now .... Prayers for @WWERomanReigns 😞🙏🏻 https://t.co/9sqk0KfFnP — Lexi Kaufman (@AlexaBliss_WWE) October 23, 2018 He’s our locker room leader. He IS the business. He’ll be back. You go...

WWE Smackdown 14/2/20 | My Coherent Review.

Last night was my 2nd anniversary of pumping out written content on this site and I thought since this show has delivered 6 or sometimes 3 out of 10s for 4 months now, I've written some lyrics about my thoughts on Smackdown in the style of the current song opening for the blue brand.  If you wanna put the instrumental version of ACDC's Are You Ready while reading this then that's cool too.  *Cue the intro* Are you Ready?  Are you ready for mediocrity! Then, get ready for disappointment.  No one needs it.  No one needs it.  No one needs it.   Even Bischoff.  Are you ready for mediocrity! *ends with some guitar solos*.  The lyrics may suck but it is at least better than whatever the hell Justin Bieber meant when he sang his current single "Yummy".  Now, on with the review. The Return Of A Moment Of Bliss (Unlike The Return Of The Dirt Sheets, Nobody Really Cares).  Both Bliss...

Let's Talk About The White Rabbit In The Room.

I haven't reviewed last year's show mainly because it was so good and clearly as extreme as any ECW match and I'm happy to tell all 3 of y'all that this one is better by several inches or so. Why? *slaps my bald head* HERE'S WHY. The opening match between Sheamus and Gunther's crew ruled harder than the Mongolian empire.  It was basically an enhanced version of Sheamus' match with Gunther last night on Smackdown and I loved it.  The Brawling Brutes' victory means one thing that is clearly obvious, a rematch between Sheamus and Gunther for the intercontinental championship aka the only series of rematches I don't mind.  Ronda Rousey and Liv Morgan delivered in what was a wrestling match equivalent to the X-Men Dark Phoenix movie.  While Bianca Belair and Bayley had their equivalent to the first Iron Man movie in that it was decent.  Drew McIntyre and Karrion Kross had an okay edition of the "Meaty men slapping meat".  That spear from Edge to...