You would think because I posted a RAW review early, the episode is actually good, right?
I yawned twice instead of 4 or 5 times so that's nice, I guess.
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Brock and Brocker Walked Near A Tree. At The Rumble, We're Going To See The One Two Three.
What I was trying to say is that both Lesnar and Lashley interacted with each other for the very first time. And the WWE champion wasted no time to roast Bob (kinda like the Distraction podcast every week).
Side note, Bobby said before all of this that the Hurt Business is no more to which my question is, why did they reunite the stable several months ago? Just like the Kevin Owens pie incident, we'll never know the answer to that question.
To confirm that the Hurt Business is DELETED off of their narrative hard drive, Lashley took out both Shelton Benjamin and Cedric Alexander.
All I can say about it is, utilize your f**king talented performers, world wrestling entertainment!
RKBRO vs Alpha Academy For The RAW Tag Team Championship.
The alpha dudes won the RAW tag team championship for the very first time aka the only time in history where the so-called "alphas" actually won something in life.
Cool.
The Street Profits And Damian Priest vs Apollo Crews, Dolph Ziggler And Robert Roode.
The match was aight. The heels win with a zigzag on Angelo Dawkins.
"Death, taxes and Seth Rollins beats Roman Reigns every single time".
I mean, true but Big E doesn't believe that, at least when it comes to defeating the man that lost the WWE title last week.
So, a match happened between the meaty and the drippy (in a good match might I add) and in this case, the swagger prevailed with the stomp.
WWE knows how to cool the steam off of the performers that recently lost a championship and it's frustrating especially since the creative folks could've done so much better with their reigns as champions.
Nikki A.S.H said to Rhea Ripley, *Scottish accent* "well f**k off, ya vegemite munching shank"
If you can't tell with this terrible line of dialogue for a Scottish person, the team of Ripley and Nikki are no more. As a matter of fact, this also signals a heel turn for Nikki A.S.H which I don't know how to feel about yet.
If they are heading towards a "superhero but very much egotistical" then I'm actually quite interested since I haven't seen that side of Nikki before so it should be a decent way to experiment with a character that is one-dimensional.
Another 24/7 championship shenanigans between Reggie, Dana Brooke, Tamina, R Truth and Akira Tozawa. Nice! Great! Mumtaz! Fantastico!
Speaking of the jumping Reg man, after he was choked out by Omos because he stood out of the big man's way, Omos squashed a local competitor aka a nicer way of calling someone a jobber (wow! great analysis, Omar).
This means we're probably going to see the former 24/7 champion and Omos wrestle next week and I couldn't be happier :)
Edge And Beth Phoenix Presents, "Roasting The Miz".
That was pretty much the gist of the entire segment other than Maryse walking away from Miz.
From a feud based on a 2010 match on Smackdown to a mixed tag team match at the end of that year because nothing happens in December.
Cooool.
So, Grayson Waller ended AJ Styles' match with Austin Theory via a DQ to promote their match at NXT tomorrow. A show I'm not reviewing anymore so I'll just pretend that I am reviewing NXT and just say the good old sentence, "will see what happens".
By the way, how come Grayson Waller calls himself a social media guru and yet his social media presence is a lot of "L + ratio + white"?
Alexa Bliss goes to therapy to heal the traumas of her destroyed ugly a** haunted doll. If "I can fix her" was an entire wrestling segment.
Bianca Belair vs Doudrop vs Liv Morgan. Winner Faces Becky Lynch For The RAW Women's Championship At The Royal Rumble.
Becky Lynch got involved in the match which is always a dumb thing for a champion to do. Like, why can't they let the scenario play out?
It only leads to a multiple person match which decreases the odds of the champion retaining the belt.
At least the match was good.
All of that led to Doudrop winning the match and she'll go on to face her fellow Celtic competitor for the RAW women's championship at the Rumble of Royal.
There's no way in hell it's going to stay as a one on one match between Doudrop and Becky Lynch.
So, to recap for all of you slow mofos.
Like: Bianca Belair vs Doudrop vs Liv Morgan, Brock doing Brock things, Seth Rollins vs Big E.
Didn't like: The continuity error regarding the Hurt Business, Becky Lynch doing the "champion interferes in a number one contender's match" cliche.